Self Originating
Be Fully Awake & Fully Human
“You haven’t come to Earth to be a spirit” – White Bull
Self Originating
Awakening is a beautiful thing. That sweet moment of awe and tenderness as the constructs of the mind crack open and the veils of ego structure lift. In this timeless moment our interconnectedness with all of life is revealed as a direct and undeniable experience. It’s a magical miracle, so extraordinary in its ordinariness… how could we have ever overlooked the beauty and simplicity of being? Awakening reveals the self we have imagined ourselves to be as an illusory construct of conditioned mind. Awakening is a blissful unburdening! Finally we are relieved of the weight we have been carrying! Finally we can rest! Awakening brings a complete and utter release from the clench of our old suffering and a knowing beyond doubt that our spiritual search is at an end. Finally, after a long and gruelling trudge we have arrived home.
Awakening, in this initial stage, is a 180° turn away from life as we have known it. Although this stage of awakening brings the peace and inner unity we have longed for, it is also a very vulnerable place. Somewhere, deep down, we know that we are only on temporary reprieve. A further 180° turn is to be made, in which we face our unhealed pain, unconscious patterns, addictions, kinks, and shadows. Try as we may, this re-entry into daily human life cannot be delayed for too long. Sooner or later, most of us find ourselves in that excruciating place of awakening without integration. We have seen far too much to go back to our old way of being, but we have not fully woken into our human experience. It’s like that place between the sleeping and wakened state and not the blissful one! This place is restless and agitated because all that is unhealed, unconscious, and unresolved within us is banging on the door and demanding we pay attention.
The opportunity here is to roll our sleeves up and get stuck into the work of integration. Awakening reveals a core awareness that brings the possibility of deep self-reflection. From here, we can dive into whatever pain and wounding arises and heal ourselves. We can bring awareness to our addictions and the grasping elements of mind. We can shine a light on our dark places, and liberate our shadows. It’s a beautiful process of defragmentation in which we slowly, one step at a time, come into a fully conscious, embodied, autonomous experience of ourselves. We know our interconnectedness with all of life, and we know ourselves as healthy Self Originating human beings. Fully awake and fully human.
Unfortunately, many don’t take this opportunity to integrate awakening. They would rather stay disconnected than face the pain of re-entry into worldly struggles. Disconnection is a powerful tool, but it is not a way to live life. At some point, we have to stop bypassing our pain. Too many people are led astray by ideals of spiritual perfection. They misinterpret the return of unhealed pain as a sign that they did not have a complete awakening. They judge themselves for identifying with what they believe to be illusory mind constructs, and find themselves returning to spiritual books and teachings desperate for that final awakening that will wipe the slate clean. If only they could see that they haven’t come to Earth to be a spirit. They have come here to be a human being, learn human lessons, and live a fully human life. Their awakening was for one purpose only, and that was to bring them back into alignment with their soul’s contract so that they may walk the path their souls agreed to before taking human form. The path of Self Originating.
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